Milano

I drove to Milan today.

No really, that’s it.  I drove the two hours to Milan on 50 ft. visibility fog covered autostrada, paid my 7.50 euros each way and came back home.

It all started this morning on a fine sunny day around my abode (that I found out sits at 1750 foot elevation) so I went for a fine run were I came up with a fine idea of going to buy a dress and some shoes in the fashion capital of the world.  All of this prefacing of course a fine three course dinner and possibly snagging some last minute tickets for the opera playing at the world renowned Teatro alla Scala at 20.00 (usually go for about 130 euros but I read they go to 25% off an hour before the show).  Yes, yes.  A fabulous plan if I do say so myself.

Reality: First of all, if no one has driven in Italy or any foreign country before, let me paint you a little picture.  There are no street names posted, no happy little exits every mile or so, no directions to follow to your destination.  You get to your destination by following the well posted blue signs located at every intersection and roundabout pointing you the direction of certain cities.  This system work well WHEN YOU CAN SEE THE SIGNS.  All of this while going at insanely high speeds for fear that the Peugeot behind me with crawl up my tailpipe.  As you might have guesses, there is a serious blanket of fog that is covering the entire country right now (except for 1700 feet and higher of course).  And I know this for a fact because I drove through THE ENTIRE COUNTRY today (oh, and round and round the roundabouts...Ace Ventura style trying to read the signs that only pop out of the fog when I’m two feet, or ½ a second away from them).  I have only the force to thank for getting me back here in one piece.  Thanks again Luke!

Milano:  Holy cow!  Driving in Milan is not recommended for the faint hearted.  There are no designated lanes or paint markings separating them, double parking, and triple turn lanes (without markings of course, everyone just piles into the middle of the intersection if you want to go left). Basically a free for all on cobblestones.  There is of course the greenpeace inspired HOV lane in the middle of all of this with periodic breaks in the separation barriers at the intersections.  Do you know how hard this makes turning left?  I hate greenpeace.

So there I am driving around Milan in my happy little toy car with my heart rate going faster than it did on my happy little run this morning wondering how one parks in Milan.  No really, does anyone know how to park in Milan?  I still haven’t figured it out.  Most signs were just a blue circle with a red slash and the numbers 0-24 below it.  Mostly I just figure this means no parking anytime.  Some signs had a rate on them…Fabulous!  Where do you pay?  There were no kiosks or meters anywhere and then there were big blue signs with a P on them lead me to closed building.  Ugh. 

The success of my day was finding the local store open past 19.00 so I got stuff to make prosciutto wrapped chicken piccata.  I make a mean chicken piccata. Oh, and I just remembered I bought tiramisu.

-Number of drivers I pissed off today: Hard to tell cause no one honks.  Chaos injected rudeness might just be the norm.

-Number of cars I hit: zero :)

-KK’s new shoes and dress: :(

P.S.  The autostrada is not the autobahn.  I mention this because some people seem to be confused.

P.P.S.  I didn’t mean what I said about greenpeace.  Love you Ali.

Yeah, you try parking here.